Weekend of 2/17 – 2/19, 2012 (movies that were on last week’s list have been left off)

3. Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance – As Johnny Blaze hides out in Eastern Europe, he is called upon to stop the devil, who is trying to take human form.

Ghost Inside Her: Spirit of Dat Azz – As Alondra Blaze hides out in Eastern Sherman Oaks, she is possessed by a ghost that is horny as HELL!

Ghost Spitter: Spit Out That Jizz – ­Lexington Steele fucks a bunch of pale girls that hate to swallow.

The Rider: Spirit of Vaginas – Shannyn made a deal with the devil, and now her penance is to come back and ride penis.

Spirit Of Vaginas Ride The Cawk Carousel

4. This Means War – Two top CIA operatives wage an epic battle against one another after they discover they are dating the same woman.

This Means Whore – Two CIA agents try to make their dicks touch after entering through opposite ends.

Jizz Means War – America is thrust (!) into World War Threesome after a CIA operative jizzes all over some Russian sluts.

His Clean Porn – It’s porn, produced by and for Christians! All the couples get married before having sex and are then miserable for the rest of their lives! It is truly His way!

Tinker Taylor Homo Spy

5. The Secret World of Arrietty – The Clock family are four-inch-tall people who live anonymously in another family’s residence, borrowing simple items to make their home. Life changes forever for the Clocks when their daughter, Arrietty, is discovered.

The Sexy World of Arriana – The Cock family are 9-inch-long people who fuck anonymous people they meet on the internet in other people’s houses. But their lives change forever when their daughter, Arriana, is dick-scovered.

The Preteen World of Arrietty – There is a secret world of preteen girls living naked within the walls of our homes. All sex breaks loose when they are discovered!

The Secretion Girl of “I’m All Wet-y” – These girls come so hard you would swear that they were pissing!

In The Pink

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Feel free to add your entries or tag lines in the comments!

Weekend of 2/10 – 2/12, 2012.

1. The Vow – A car accident puts Paige in a coma, and when she wakes up with sever memory loss, her husband Leo works to win her heart again.

The Plow – A fall off her farm’s plow leaves Tasha with sever memory loss, and she must fuck every guy from her past in order to…I don’t know…remember shit, I guess.

De-flow(er) – Krissy’s vagina has amnesia, and she must search down the boy from high school who took her virginity to de-flower her once again.

Pee Cow – a fat chick gets pissed on, and the audience tries to forget they just watched that.

Slow metabolism. Full fridge.

2. Safe House – A young CIA agent is tasked with looking after a fugitive in a safe house. But when the safe house is attacked, he finds himself on the run with his charge.

Face Spouse – A young husband is tasked with looking on as a train of fugitives jizz on his wife’s face. But when they’re all out of cum, he finds himself trying to cum on his charge.

Safe Ho’s – A young CIA agent is tasked with looking after the president’s whore house. But when the sluts get horny, he finds himself fucking all the girls.

Space Whores – Houston we have a problem…a SEXY problem!

3. Journey 2: The Mysterious Island – Sean Anderson partners with his mom’s boyfriend on a mission to find his grandfather, who is thought to be missing on a mythical island.

Journey, Too: The Mysterious Guy Band – A gay Journey cover band tries to find the lead singer (Skeeve Perry)’s grandfather, who is thought to missing on the mythical Fire Island.

Journey 2: The Mysterious Hymen – Sean Michaels is your mom’s boyfriend, and is trying to find a magical amulet to make her pussy tighter.

Spermy 2: The Hairiest Pie, Man – Your favorite cartoon Casanova, Spermy, is back with more sexy animated adventure! This time he is in search for a mythical island where everyone still has 70’s style bush!

Unlike you, ya sissy homo, your mom LIKES getting choked out!

4. The Phantom Menace – Two Jedi Knights uncover a wider conflict when they are sent as emissaries to the blockaded planet Naboo.

The Phantom Penis – Two Peni Knights uncover a wide cumflict when they are sent as sexissaries to the big titted planet Taboo.

The Handsome Man Ass – Two dudes do it. One is really handsome.

Hey, Plant ‘Em In Us! – Two stoners stumble across a planet populated entirely by women! These two lucky bastards must impregnate as many as they can in order to keep the species from dying out.

5. Chronicle – Three high school friends gain superpowers after making an incredible discovery. Soon, though, they find their lives spinning out of control and their bond tested as they embrace their darker sides.

Momicle – Three high school friends find themselves fucking each other’s moms. Soon, though, they find their desires spinning out of control and their sex bonds tested as they start fucking black chicks.

Chronic Hole – Stacee makes an incredible discovery…in her pants! Soon, though, she finds herself needing it more and more until she becomes a complete dick junkie!

Cumicle – Ron Jeremy plays an ice cream truck driver who “makes his own wares”. The kids aren’t allowed to have any, but all the neighborhood moms can’t get enough.

Should have been called 'Turd'.

6. The Woman in Black – A young lawyer travels to a remote village where he discovers a vengeful ghost of a scorned woman is terrorizing the locals.

The Man in Blacks – A young lawyer travels to a remote African village where he a horny group of sexy women who need his balls.

The Woman and Sacks – Terrie is terrorized by balls. Can she overcum her fears and still make partner at her “firm”?!

The Movement in Back – A scorned woman is terrorizing the locals of a remote village by making them do her in da butt.

"In a world of balls..."

7. The Grey – In Alaska, an oil drilling team struggles to survive after a plane crash strands them in the wild. Hunting the humans are a pack of wolves who see as intruders.

Ms. Grey – In Sasha, a team is drilling like a pack of wolves.

The Pink – In Alaska, the only way to stay warm in the wild is to be an intruder. Over, and over, and over again.

The Bang – Evan Stone drinks a bunch of airplane sized bottles of vodka then fucks a lot on a wolf skin rug.

8. Big Miracle – In small town Alaska, a news reporter recruits his ex-girlfriend – a Greenpeace volunteer – on a campaign to save a family of gray whales trapped by rapidly forming ice in the Arctic Circle.

Big Mirahole – An Eskimo reporter finds that his ex-girlfriend has a whale sized hole!

Big Penis Cole – Cole Porker is on a campaign to save the family of Sasha Grey by rapidly tapping that “Asstic Circle”.

Big Miracle…In Your Ass! – I think you can figure this one out…

9. The Descendants – A land baron tries to re-connect with his two daughters after his wife suffers a boating accident

The Penis Dance – A handjob baron tries to connect with the two sorority girls living next door after his wife stops putting out.

The Descend Pants – Janyt tries to re-connect with her sluttly single ways after her husband suffers a terrible motor boating accident.

The Big Implants – In Hawaii they have one word for ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’…but no word for ‘too big’!

10. Underworld Awakening – When human forces discover the existence of the Vampire and Lycan clans, a war to eradicate both species commences. The vampire warrioress Selene leads the battle against humankind.

Underworld Afuckening – When human forces discover the existence of Vampire sex parties, a plague of erections threatens both species. The vampire whore-ess, Selena, leads the battle against too many boners.

Under Girl Bukkake-ing – The industry’s strongest cum slingers try and cum all over the same girl, while lying on their backs!

Thunderhole Awakening – The sexy and mysterious Indian warrior, Thunderhole, discovers that he hates vampires. So he tries to fuck them all to death!

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Feel free to add your entries or tag lines in the comments!

Arguably the first black many unexpectedly let into their homes whilst flipping through the channels back in the day,  Don was the ring master of the looking glass that was America's great, "dark" secret.

With a voice as smooth and shiny as a baton up an immigrants keister, Cornelius arguably broke ground in that he made white folk fear black just a little less.  The calm in the storm of dance moves both aboriginal in nature and mind-bogglingly impressive in execution, he was, for all intents and purposes, America's Lando Calrissian...before that Malt-liquor shilling cocksucker sold out Han, of course.

Raise a glass.

So long, motherfuckers.

Link

"Did I say anything to anyone? Or leave her? No, I didn’t. For, like thousands of other male victims of domestic violence, I was mortally ashamed of what was happening to me, convinced if only I was a better husband, these attacks would stop."

You want answers?

I want the truth!

YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!...YOU'RE A HOMO!!!

The character-vasectomy this guy stuck around for tells me they were in the domination routines.  The shaming kind likely involving fecal play.

"I started to make decisions based entirely on what made her happy as I didn’t want to experience her wrath again."

Wrong answer, loser.  ANY man worth his weight in salt knows the LAST thing you ever do is to TRY to make some yapping slit happy.  Ugh.

Word to the wise: if your wife/girlfriend/date EVER dares to flash a pang of anger towards you she's trying to tell you something (only not what you think).  It's time to take her backdoor whilst shoving her face into a pillow.

Feigning fear. Getting wet.

But for one lurker (one of these ladies?) it was all too much...and complaint of sorts was lodged.  Here it is in its entirety:

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Stumbled upon this looking for something else...I had to comment...Who IS Vertigo? With a name like that explains his comments on these 10 Most Beautiful Ladies by D Magazine...I think D Magazine got it right, Vertigo must have no life...

Definition of "Vertigo" Vertigo /ˈvɜː(ɹ)tɨɡoʊ/ (from the Latin vertō "a whirling or spinning movement"[1]) is a type of dizziness, where there is a feeling of motion when one is stationary.[2] The symptoms are due to a dysfunction of the vestibular system in the inner ear.[2] It is often associated with nauseaand vomiting as well as difficulties standing or walking.

Oh, well that explains "Vertigo's" comments then...

And here are more pictures of the girls for those who asked for them on this blog, since Vertigo (using a fake picture for himself) tried to use some of the most unflattering pictures for these girls so he could make his comments...PATHETIC!

Sweet, smart, beautiful girl, Samantha. Don't hate just because she wouldn't give you the time of day.

Aubree-Anna 41? More like 27 as most thought before the magazine came out with her early 30s. You've heard her before? Find that hard to believe.

Pat Smith - does more good with her charity "Treasure You" than you do with this blog. Based on your comments on her and many of the other ladies, I would say you're a little prejudice and stereotypical as well

Charlene may be a contractor operations supervisor but based on these pics could be a model...

Candice reports NEWS which are based on FACTS unlike some of the things stated in this blog...try doing full research before you type something...and all the guys who made comments on them? Obviously followers.

Julie is STUNNING for 39, has 8 year old twins? Vertigo says she's not a model...Really?

Tara does a lot for paws in the city - dogs that need to be rescued. Again, where's your picture Vertigo?

Shusmita IS what Dallas has become DIVERSE..I love the different cultures. This guy must be a one-race rules kind of dude.

Hollie - she's on ESPN Radio you're on a blog that hardly anyone cares about...Intimidated much?Also, you're right she's not like a "tramp" because she's CLASSY

Purvi is like one of the HOTTEST lawyers I've ever seen! And that's coming from a female, so are you blind?

I just had to say something. Seems like Vertigo is pretty desperate and will say anything. These girls are way out of his league. He would never say these things to them in person, but he hides behind his computer screen. That's okay, we all have thoughts, some of us just have a way of throwing them all up so everyone has to smell the stench and comment or ignore it and move on. I chose to comment.

Even though P.L.'s intro was a stark harbinger of what was to come, "...and winner of BET, NAACP and many other performing awards...", I foolishly remained hopeful the disembowelment would be tolerable.  Oh how I was mistaken.

Now, granted, if you can look past the over-the-top vibrato (which makes it sound the VCR (callback?) is in the fritz with a modulation issue) - a technique now aped by every white singer on the planet (save maybe the dude fronting GWAR) - LaBelle holds relatively true to the actual notes/cadence until the bitter end...when things morph into a botched 3rd trimester abortion.

Yes, all cities are filled with, ahem, "minorities" (see: blacks)... but Philly has always been known as a town full of hard-working, blue collar honkies with generational axes to grind, even if against no one in particular.  But things changed (see: Demographics), and by the mid 80s "they'd" elected "their" first black Mayor.  Granted there was a brief 539 respite, but the place has now gone full blown Wesley Snipes, never to return.

The NHL and NBC did what was expected of them (what's expected of all of us):  they held their nose and pocketed their sense of dignity in the name of progress.  Dare I ask: can anyone stop the urbanization (Blacksploitation?) of our National Anthem?

I guess one of the bigger stories of the year was that we killed the supposed Lord Vader of the Jihadists; a man with so much influence and power that when finally ambushed his squirrelly ass it wasn't at some palatial fortress surrounded by loyalists armed to the teeth ready to die in his name. No, El Capitán was holed up in some broke-dick rancher, reduced to beating off to VHS porn on a 27" shitbox. Oh the humanity!

"They blacked out the Bengals game?! Fuck!"

Ok, Osama was still "technically" the face of terrorism worldwide and had to be dealt with accordingly. But the motherfucker was subsisting on a diet of NES games and whatever scant intel could be smuggled in on floppy disks (?!!!) compatible with is Apple IIe. Talk about Hell on earth!

What else...

On an upside, both Sarah Pail and Glenn Beck seemed to have lost a substantial amount of relevance as the year progressed. Though I don't suffer from Palin/Beck derangement syndrome the vehement haters out there apparently do - convinced the former is somehow dangerously relevant outside of her cursory political influence gleaned from her relative fuckability (the REAL reason so many fatty lib she-bitches loath her, BTW) and the latter is the anti-Christ incarnate - I do think both are brilliant hucksters, profiting from the very people who'd just as well see them dead. Chapeau, now go away.

Bikers like Palin? Weird.

Bieber? Beiber? Barber? Who the fuck cares. Where this kid came from is beyond me, but much like that abortion I forced my college girlfriend to get shortly before dumping her, I'm now haunted (kidding about the abortion haunting me, BTW. I can't bring a half-Korean into the family!). I guess he's talented on some level, but the real hat tip needs to go to whatever PR team managed to spread his infectious seed like something out of Outbreak; I mean Christmas this year was a huge eye-opener as ALL of my nieces had full-blown Bieber-fever. We're talking toothbrushes that play his songs, Bieber dolls, weatpants for 5 year olds with 'Justin Bieber' painted across the ass like those slut-tastic Juicy/Pink ones for grown up ex/wannabe strippers, etc... Lord, deliver us/me.

Speaking of Koreans...

Kim Jong Il croaked which led to what I found to be one of the funniest videos of the year:

That's a spicy meatball!!!

Anyway, prepare for 2012 where we all get to get eye/ear-fucked for an entire year with election bullshit. As much as it pains me, the safe money is on Barack Durant hitting a deep three as time expires to take the W.

Finally:

*ziiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip*

And in closing:

Me rikey!!!

Goodnight and good luck.

This nex wan frawm Preetsburger!

Rink

Reemine me frunny joke: two bracks and a Mexeecawner in car.  Who drive?

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The Pohreece!

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Not have dis beeg of boner since I hear those ugree irand rats (Japraneesers) re-make Mothra frick: